So ok... this is going to be a whiney post but that's why it's private. I've been keeping busy while Joe's been away but honestly, at the end of the day I'm TIRED. I'm exhausted. Physically and mentally. I'm worn out. I am a little stressed. I wish hubby was here to help. I don't know how you single Mom's do it, seriously. I have even MORE admiration for you. I just can't do it! LOL Maybe it'd be different if I had "my" family nearby. We have Joe's family nearby but it's not the same. I mean, they're sweet, I love them, they really are. But it's not like how it is with my Mom or my sister. Maybe it'd be easier then. I try to keep Sofia busy too. But as you know, "toodlers" have a ton of energy. I need someone I can high five and take over. Sheesh! I think she misses her daddy too because I've noticed she wakes up super sensitive in the mornings. I dunno. Maybe it's just my imagination. I mean, she's used to him not being here in the mornings but maybe she's noticed he's not here in the evenings and it's affecting her? I don't know!
Anyway... because of my tiredness, exhaustion and stress, I have taken it out on my hubby when he calls. I feel "mad" at him. It's like I recent the fact that he's gone. I know it's not his fault. That he's away on business. But then it ticks me off because I KNOW he was dying to get a business assignment there again. Volunteering for it. I know volunteering is good for his record. But still bugs me. haha And what doesn't help? That he calls me to tell me goodnight because he's going out with his buddies there. And what does that mean? DRINKING. Yeah, I should trust him. I do. I don't think he'd do anything stupid with anybody. I mean I don't trust him when he says he's not getting drunk. He told me not to worry because he wasn't driving. That one is friends was picking him up. Oh yeah, that makes me feel better! They're going to drink too! Augh. I told him to just call me the next day. And hung up on him. I know he deserves to have fun but when he called to tell me that, Sofia was throwing a fit and bawlin. Seriously. BAD TIMING. *takes deep breath* It's only been one week. Two more to go. Will I make it?
This morning my sister in law asked me if she could take Sofia to church so I could have some free time. I said yes. I appreciate that so much. But now I miss her. LOL It's only been 3 hrs or so. I have to jump in the shower. But anyway... just wanted to vent. Sorry. =/
Have a great weekend.
ReplyDeleteI tried leaving a audio message but it didn't work for some reason. Will have to figure this out. Anyway, I think what you are feeling is normal. I don't know what it is that touches the nerves of a lot of women when they hear "going out with the buddies". It is such a woman thing to feel angry at that. :) So don't worry, you will feel better tomorrow when Joe calls you. Hopefully!! :)
ReplyDeleteoh geezzz i can't spell. LOL i was typing to fast.
ReplyDeleteaaww...i wish i was closer to. God knows when we were the only ones home we had a great time. And you know i can watch sofia like no other...remember that day of the yard when u took a nap and i had bioth kids. I had a blast. they were both good, shoot i didn't need a stinkin' bat that day. i was chillin' with the kids. trust me if you were here Ana i'd b like uh..here's oscar im gonna go get my nails did. then you could do the same. aawwwww i miss you more now.
ReplyDeleteConnie: LOL yeah he called me but I was still "resentful". So the conversation ended very quickly. I just didn't want to talk to him. I know, I'm mean! But it just takes over me. Oh well. Maybe he'll call me tomorrow. Thank you for your words.
ReplyDeleteI remember that! Ahhh... I haven't taken a nap in peace like that in forever! LOL Well, I lie. Joe helps out a lot but I mean, when other people besides us take care of her, I haven't felt like that. Where I didn't have a worry in the world because I knew she'd be ok. I miss you SO MUCH! I've been looking for you online the past few days y nada. Hopefully we can catch each other soon. I love you sis!
ReplyDeleteDon't worry this is all normal. I used to think the same thing when Ray was in Germany. He and his buddy would go to the movies, out for drinks or the GRAND opening of HOOTERS in Germany. YEAH that was a sore spot! lol Cause all I could think of was great you are having fun and I'm home with the kids. But then again he missed out on them growing and he missed holidays so it was a even trade I guess. lol
ReplyDeleteit's good for all of us to vent, venting is good!
ReplyDeletehang in there hon, i'm sure you will make it though and if you need to vent again call me, you know i'm around.
luff ya!
Aww Ana! I could understand how you feel. Thanks for posting about this venting! hehe, sometimes it seems your life is perfect :)
ReplyDeleteI would feel the same way if I was home with my daughter & my hubby was out with his friends (understandably so since he's out of town on business), so it's normal to feel overwhelmed when you're used to having that extra helping hand.
I'm sure he'll be back before you know it :)
Laura: OMG my life is not perfect by any means. And I don't claim it to be. I just don't like to air dirty laundry all the time. NOBODY's life is perfect, I don't care what anybody says.
ReplyDeleteTime is passing. Eventually. I take it day by day. I just can't wait for it all to be over with.
3 weeks is a long time. You are allowed to feel your feelings, don't be so hard on yourself. He'll be home soon enough and wishing he was away... LOL!
ReplyDelete